Hearing my mother's voice....
Are you trying?
My mother's voice still rings in my ears: “I know you're trying – very trying!”
This would be in response to my whining about something I hadn't accomplished. I was explaining to her that I was trying to do whatever it was. There was no sympathy coming from her. I guess this is one of the reasons I resonate with the saying, “Do something or don't do something, but never try.”
In the years that have passed since my childhood, I realize what wisdom there is in this. When we say we'll try to do something, we aren't putting enough energy behind our intention or our actions to reach the desired results. When we only try to do something, our attempts are half-hearted and it's easy to give up. On the other hand, when we say we will do something, we put our entire self behind the actions we take.
What about when we're not sure of a particular course of action? Shouldn't we just try and see what happens? No. We make a commitment to accomplish whatever it is and put ourselves into it 100%. It might work or it might not work. If it doesn't work, it won't be because we didn't put ourselves wholly into it. By putting ourselves into the project 100%, even if the outcome isn't what we had hoped it would be, there will be many gains for us along the way.
Let's use the example of starting a business. When I started my first newspaper, I had been shown in my mind's eye what the publication would be like. Even though I didn't have the financial resources to publish a newspaper, I began to plan for it. I wrote down what sorts of articles it would have, the columns I would run, and names of businesses that might be interested in advertising. I did this for about five months.
I held back because I didn't have the money. I didn't commit to the project. How could I? How can you start a business without money? Then one day, I opened my mail and found the following quote:
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred.
“A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.” (This quote is usually attributed to Goethe but some people say parts of it were written by William Hutchinson Murray. No matter who wrote it, there is a lot of inspirational truth in it.)
I felt like someone had slapped me across the face. I realized I was trying to start a newspaper. I had not committed. I picked up the phone and called my boss and gave him a month's notice. When I hung up the phone, I was terrified. What had I just done? Now, not only did I not have the financing to start a business, I also didn't have a job.
What I did have, however, was a commitment. No, money didn't magically fall out of the sky into my lap. The road to success didn't suddenly beckon me to stroll down it with no challenges. But as I stepped forward, another piece of the puzzle revealed itself. The job of building a business from nothing, without resources, was not easy. Many times the only thing that made it happen was the fact that I was committed.
I was not going to stop unless God reach down from Her heaven and flattened me, clearly saying, “Go no further.” Although it came very close to this a few times, I kept going and eventually the path became less strewn with boulders and more and more gravel showed up.
How do we make such a commitment? It's easy to do when we feel assured of the outcome. And this is what most people want before they commit to something. It's like the banks wanting you to prove you don't need a loan before they will give you one. They want a sure thing.
First of all, you must decide if you really want to do whatever it is. How badly do you want it? On a scale of one to ten - with one being a little bit to 10 being I must have or do this – how badly do you want it? If you score below a nine, find something else you really want to do or be.
Then ask yourself, what am I willing to do, not do, be or not be? What am I willing to give up in order to have this happen? Write it down. If your list is short or if what you write down seems really easy, you are probably not ready to commit.
Write down how far you are willing to go before giving up. How bad would it have to get before you would stop? If your goal relates to a job or business, am I willing to take some sort of low-income job to support myself while building my dream? Am I willing to fail?
One thing I would always tell myself and others was, “Well, if this doesn't work, I can always get a job at a fast food joint.” This was very motivating for me because the last thing I wanted to do was flip burgers!
Lastly, make a date when you will begin. Write it down. Then do it, no matter what. There's a rough edge that comes with commitment that many people don't like. But it takes that level of commitment or you're only trying.
And we know what my mother said about trying. Don't try. Do.
By the way, currently I offer two classes on demand through Udemy.com One is designed to help you learn how to work with crystals in daily life. The other helps you learn how to be a more effective teacher or speaker. And if you want to read more about how I started my first newspaper (as well as some other harrowing life experiences), read my autobiography available here.
Living with grace and ease,
Krysta